James Brien, CEO of Easy Online Divorce, says it may seem like harmless fun but can lead to serious complications for committed relationships, especially as work events create a fertile ground for blurred boundaries.
“People underestimate the emotional closeness that can develop with a work spouse,” said James.
“What starts as shared lunches or venting about work can quickly become an intimate relationship that rivals the emotional support someone might get from their real-life partner.”
This closeness, while not necessarily romantic, can sometimes cross boundaries – especially when alcohol and a festive atmosphere come into play, as they will at many end-of-year celebrations.
The term “work spouse” describes a close bond with a colleague that mirrors a romantic relationship in terms of shared support and emotional connection.
These partnerships are often based on shared experiences, workloads, and even office banter, creating a relationship that can sometimes feel more understanding than a partner at home.
And while some people maintain this relationship in a healthy way, James cautions that workplace bonds can too easily develop into something more, given the right conditions.
He added: “During Christmas parties, the combination of alcohol, a relaxed environment and pent-up emotions from the stresses of the year can amplify these connections.
“You might find yourself sharing personal information you wouldn’t otherwise disclose, and physical boundaries can become more relaxed too.”
This is where the “work spouse” relationship can transition from a supportive friendship into a potential relationship risk, he says.
James also points to the broader impact on primary relationships, noting that the existence of a close “work spouse” can create a distance between partners at home, leading to emotional disconnect. Over time, a spouse or partner may become resentful.
“Many couples end up in counselling because one partner feels replaced by the work spouse,” he said.
With the Christmas party season fast approaching, James advises those in committed relationships to be mindful of their interactions. Setting boundaries, he suggests, is key.
“It’s a matter of recognising the line between a healthy, supportive workplace relationship and one that could threaten your relationship at home,” he added. “Be mindful and take a step back if the lines start to blur.”
